Understanding "The world/the other is our projection"


The world is your perception of it. Inside and outside always match—they are reflections of each other. The world is the mirror image of your mind. If you experience chaos and confusion inside, your external world has to reflect that. You have to see what you believe, because you are the confused thinker looking out and seeing yourself. You are the interpreter of everything, and if you’re chaotic, what you hear and see has to be chaos. Even if Jesus, even if the Buddha, were standing in front of you, you would hear confused words, because confusion would be the listener. You would hear only what you thought he was saying, and you’d start arguing with him the first time your story was threatened.

As for my being your projection, how else could I be here? It’s not as though I had a choice. I am the story of who you think I am, not who I really am. You see me as old, young, beautiful, ugly, honest, deceitful, caring, uncaring. I am, for you, your uninvestigated story, your own hidden secret, your myth. I am yourself.

I understand that who you think I am is true for you. I was innocent also, but only for forty-three years, until the moment when I woke up to the way things really are. “It’s a tree. It’s a table. It’s a chair.” Is it true? Have you stopped to ask yourself? Have you ever become still and listened as you asked you? Who told you it was a tree? Who was the original authority? How did they know? My entire life, my entire identity, had been built on the trust and uninquiring innocence of a child. Are you this kind of child? Through this Work, your toys and fairy tales are laid aside as you begin to read the book of true knowledge, the book of yourself.



People tell me, “But Katie, your happiness is all a projection,” and I say, “Yes, and isn’t it beautiful? I love living this happy dream. I’m having a wonderful time!” If you lived in heaven, would you want it to end? It doesn’t end. It can’t. That is what’s true for me, until it’s not. If it should change, I always have inquiry. I answer the questions, the truth is realized within me, and the doing meets the undone, the something meets the nothing. In the balance of the two halves, I am free.
(Byron Katie)

FAMILY CONSTELLATIONS WORKSHOPS





Children rarely or never dare to have a happier or more successful life than their parents. Unconsciously they remain faithful to the family traditions that have been invisibly passed down from generations sabotaging their own life and happiness. The Family Constellation work is a way to discover these ties and invisible forces that have been unwittingly passing from generation to generation. Bert Hellinger

         The desire to belong is inherent in all human beings. As individuals we act in accordance with the desires and norms of our groups in order to fit in and be accepted, sometimes no matter what the price. The Hellinger Approach helps us open our hearts in order to begin knowing a larger, yet more personal truth about the meaning of our existence within the context of these bigger more powerful energetic influences.

         Systemic Family Therapy was first developed by the German therapist Bert Hellinger. In this therapeutic approach the person is considered as part of a greater whole – a family system. His individual behaviour, feelings and attitudes have to be understood in the context of this larger group.

    As in any other system, unspoken laws operate in the family which guides our behaviour, although most of the time we are largely unaware of it. Suffering usually arises in a family member when one or more members of the system unconsciously violate these archaic laws.  They do this unknowingly, not out of rebelliousness as one might expect, but out of love – what in family constellation is called  ' a blind' love.

         By viewing family situations in the context of a larger whole, we gain insights into the deeper reasons why things occur in a family: why individuals are pushed out, denied a place or not spoken of; and why behavioural patterns appear to repeat, often unconsciously, over generations. The family energy field or "family soul" as referred to by Bert Hellinger, serves as the basis for exploring and understanding relationships as well as eventually constructing solutions to issues that trouble our being. This family soul includes both the living and the dead and has a deep effect on the present generation.

         This method looks at the patterns within the family energy field. Bert Hellinger calls these patterns "orders of love." A few of these orders are that members of a family are bound together by a common conscience, everyone has the right to belong, gains and losses are balanced over generations and the solution to our presenting issue is always based in love.

         By creating a picture of the family energy field in the form of a constellation, the Hellinger Approach encourages us to turn back toward the family of origin and gain strength in a new, healthier way. Knowing that we are deeply connected to our family soul, and that neither time nor distance can alter that, we are capable of exploring the complexities of our family's past. Openly looking at our family of origin provides us with the opportunity to uncover secrets and truths, and investigate the lost and unexplained. By seeing these various components, we acknowledge deeper truths of our family soul, of the things that bind us together. When we look with open eyes, mind, and heart - void of moral judgment - we are capable of letting go of that which does not serve to our personal growth.

          Most importantly, we learn to gain strength from a deeper conscious connection to the family that we are a part of. We can simply breathe and as Hellinger says, "acknowledge what is."

         What has been learned from working with family energy fields is that all groups have a collective consciousness, or greater soul, that has an unconscious influence on those in the group. A way of understanding this energetic phenomenon can come from looking at our connection and identification with the various groups we belong to. First and foremost, the strongest soul group we are attached to is our family of origin. After that, there is our connection to our heritage and the groups that represent our cultural background. These can include family religions, racial and ethnic backgrounds we were born into, the part of the country we live in and the nation or state we identify with. Each of these larger soul groups possesses a conscious and unconscious energetic influencing our behaviour.

         Family Constellation is rooted in the understanding that through the acknowledgement of what is as it is, and by becoming aware of our basic entanglements, we are able to move beyond the family. Our way of relating becomes more open, conscious and flexible.

PROFESSIONAL COUNSELLING-COACHING






Counselling is "talking with the purpose" of exploring, discovering and clarifying ways of living more resourcefully and towards greater well being.

Counselling can help anyone seeking greater understanding of their thoughts, feelings and behaviour. It can benefit you if you are feeling stressed, anxious, or depressed because of personal, relationship or work problems.
Changes vary widely depending on what your individual goals are and the directions you wish to pursue:
  • Overcome self-defeating or destructive behaviour patterns
  • Feel more confident, centered, and less anxious
  • Improve your relationships with others and yourself
  • Live life more authentically, in line with your values

As a Professional Counsellor I provide a calm, listening ear without judging or telling you what to do. Counselling gives you time to talk, space to discover your own resources and strategies to cope with difficult situations. Counselling helps you to come to terms with experiences and difficulties and helps you develop ways to cope with life-challenges.
At the first appointment you will have the opportunity to discuss your problem and to decide if counselling is right for you.
Some issues can be resolved in short-term counselling, whilst others may require longer term work.
WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT
In the first session or two, the focus will be on assessing your needs and on beginning to develop goals. From there, a typical counselling session revolves around helping you to:

  • feel validated and deeply understood
  • identify and connect more fully with your personal strengths, skills and abilities.
  • find new ways of seeing yourself and/or your situation
  • learn to respond in a nurturing and effective way to your different emotions
  • actively apply practical and essential skills for emotional strengthening and healing.
The style I use is gentle, thought-provoking, and focused. I am well trained in several well-established and highly effective counselling theories. All of that allows me to work well with clients through a variety of diverse issues.
I avoid using diagnostic labels, as they can be very shaming and counterproductive in therapy. I prefer that we make sense of your difficulties through a personal approach that acknowledges your uniqueness. I don't believe those struggles ultimately define who you are.

I AM ESPECIALISED IN:
Coping with Depression & loneliness - Lack of confidence -Stress Managenment -Surviving Sexual abuse -Dependency, Addictions - Suicidal Thoughts -Living through bereavement : Divorce, Abandonment, Death . Life coaching.
Over 60's Therapy-
Couple Therapy -
Family Therapy -
Parenting issues


How much does it cost?
Appointments are usually weekly, last 60 minutes and are paid at the end of each session.The practice is located in the picturesque village of Canteras (Cartagena-Murcia) just five minutes drive from Eroski (E-22) and has ample parking available..
WHO DO I WORK WITH?

I work with individuals and couples including same sex couples and parents and children. I see clients for corporate organisations and take referrals from GP’s. I also see clients who refer themselves privately.


HOW LONG DOES THE WORK TAKE?

Sessions are weekly and last 1 hour.How many sessions you need would depend on what brings you to counselling. Some people have very specific issues where a short term contract is appropriate. Others have more general concerns which may require a longer timescale. We would discuss this at your initial appointment.
Starting right where you are
Some people still have ideas about counselling- being for people who are sick or weak—this is simply not true. If you’ve been feeling stuck, getting help and support for your concerns is a resourceful, timely step to take. Counselling is designed to help you get on with the business of living more fully: feeling better and strengthening your ability to connect with yourself and others.

LIFE COACHING



What is Life Coaching?


Sometimes we just can’t see the wood for the trees and need to be able to see things differently. At other times we feel unclear on our life purpose and what is important to us. Uncertain on our direction or what it is we want out of life. We don´t reach our full potential. We feel unfulfilled and want to nurture new possibilities.


Life Coaching is about 


  • seeing choices
  • taking action
  • focusing on the bigger picture of your life
  • letting go of expectation.


Clients set their goals and the reason they hire a coach is to accomplish their goals. 
As a coach I assist my clients to become the worlds leading experts on themselves.
I can provide experience and the successes of former clients. 
As a Coach I am like a copilot sitting in the passenger seat of an automobile traveling to the same destination (the accomplishment of you goals). .
 The goals that are best suited for the coaching process require clients to grow and improve as a person      to accomplish them.



"Life coaching" clients reduce their stress, increase their energy, make better decisions, increase their life balance, increase their peace of mind, and focus more on what is really important to them.
We both must discover the path to success together, but you, the Client will control and follow the path of discovery that reveals you inner passions, desires, values and priorities.
Give me a ring and find out more.



EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE


EFT is based on a new discovery that has provided thousands with relief from pain, diseases and emotional issues. Simply stated, it is an emotional version of acupuncture except needles aren't necessary. Instead, you stimulate well established energy meridian points on your body by tapping on them with your fingertips. The process is easy to memorize and is portable so you can do it anywhere. It launches off the EFT Discovery Statement which says...
"The cause of all negative emotions is a disruption in the body's energy system."
And because our physical pains and diseases are so obviously connected with our emotions the following statement has also proven to be true...
"Our unresolved negative emotions are major contributors to most physical pains and diseases."
This common sense approach draws its power from:
  1. Time-honored Eastern discoveries that have been around for over 5,000 years and
  2. Albert Einstein, who told us back in the 1920's that everything (including our bodies) is composed of energy.

VIBRATIONAL HEALING


There is more to the human body than the physical body. Unfortunately, most people consider the physical body and the material world to be the only reality that exists.

 They believe this because for them, these are the only things that can be discerned with their own physical senses and understood by their rational mind. But there are numerous energy bodies within and around the human body. :
1. The ethereal body
2. The emotional (astral) body
3. The mental body
4. The spiritual body


And Each energy body possesses its own vibrational frequency, from the lowest (ethereal) to the highest (spiritual).

The practitioner places their hands in a number of positions on or above the recipient’s body allowing the free flow of healing energy to pass through. The energy flows to the area where it is most needed.

 Every treatment is different and each person will report different effects, such as warmth, tingling sensations, sometimes cold, whatever the individual’s experience it is a deeply relaxing and nurturing experience, bringing a sense of well-being and peace.

To sgtart with you could  live by this precepts from the Meiji Emperor, that if applied with consciousness, would heal the body, bring peace of mind, and happiness in life.

Just for today, thou shall not anger.
Just for today, thou shall not worry.
Thou shall be grateful for the many blessings.
Earn thy livelihood with honest labor.
Be kind to thy neighbors.
as taught by Mrs. Takata.

First-Time Treatment: 

Treat for three to four consecutive days (every 24 hours). It takes this long for the body to completely fill and adapt t this potent energy and begin the detox process. The number/frequency of additional treatments can be determined after the initial series is completed.


Always continue treatments until the energy is balanced, healing is complete and health is wholly restored. 


• I do not diagnose or prescribe anything. Healing with supreme energy treatment works on all levels. It covers the nervous, circulatory and endocrine systems, all major organs and the new chakras .


Both hands channel the Supreme Energy equally. It is not necessary to consider the positive or negative sides of the body for hand placement. 


• Sjupreme Energy is not just for when you are sick.


A little Energy healing is better than no healing at all.




YOUR FOURTH CHAKRA : COACHING OF THE HEART



Located near your heart, in the very centre of your chest, your fourth chakra is de domain of human intimacy. It is essential to affection, warmth, nurturing, friendship and familiarity. Your fourth chakra is the seat of your ability to feel joy, unity, laughter and especially, love- the very highest power in your life. It expands your capacity to be generous, sensitive, forgiving and tolerant.
This chakra resonates to our emotional perceptions, which determine the quality of our lives far more than our mental perceptions. As children we react to our circumstances with a range of emotions; love, passion, confidence, hope, despair, hate, envy and fear. As adults we are challenged to generate within ourselves an emotional climate and steadiness from which to act consciously and with compassion.
More than any other chakra, the fourth represents our capacity to ~Let go and let ~God~. By releasing our emotional pain, by letting go of our need to know why things have happened as they have, we reach a state of tranquillity. In order to achieve that inner peace, however, we have to embrace the healing energy of forgiveness and release our lesser need for human, self determined justice.
Primary Strengths of a balanced fourth chakra are: Love, forgiveness, compassion, dedication, inspiration, hope, trust and the ability to heal oneself and others.
Primary Fears of an unbalanced fourth chakra are: Fears of Loneliness, commitment, and "following ones heart"; fear of inability to protect oneself emotionally, fear of emotional weakness and betrayal. Loss of fourth chakra energy can give rise to jealousy, bitterness, anger, hatred, and an inability to forgive others as well as love is becoming recognised as a force that influences and perhaps determines biological activity. Love helps us to heal others and ourselves.
Life crises that have issues of love at their core, divorce, death of a loved one, emotional abuse, abandonment, adultery are often the cause of an illness, and not just an event that coincidentally precedes it. Physical healing often requires, and may demand, the healing of emotional issues.
The expression "If you can’t love yourself, you can’t love anyone else" is commonplace. Yet for many people loving oneself remains a vague notion, which we often act out in material ways, through shopping sprees and outrageous holidays. But rewarding oneself with trips and toys is using physical pleasure to express self appreciation. While this type of reward is enjoyable, it can obstruct our contact with the deeper emotional stirrings of the heart that emerge when we need to evaluate a relationships, or a job, or some other troubled circumstance that affects our well-being. Loving oneself as a fourth chakra challenge means having the courage to listen to the hearts emotional messages and spiritual directives.
Healing is possible through acts of forgiveness. Self love means caring for ourselves enough to forgive people in our past so that the wounds can no longer damage us - for our wounds do not hurt the people who hurt us, they hurt only us.
Our fourth chakra culture has seen national increases in divorce. The opening of the fourth chakra has transformed the archetype of marriage into the archetype of partnership. As a result most contemporary marriages require a strong sense of ~self~ for success, rather than the abdication of ~self~ that was required in traditional marriages. The symbolic meaning of marriage is that one must be in union with one’s own personality and spirit first. After one has a clear understanding of oneself, one can create a successful intimate partnership. The increase in divorce is therefore rooted directly in the opening of the fourth chakra, which draws people into self discovery for the first time. Many people ascribe the breakdown of their marriage to the fact that their spouse has given them no support for their emotional, psychological and intellectual needs, and as a result they had to seek out a true partnership.
Healing is simple, but it is not easy. The steps are few yet they demand great effort.
Commit yourself to healing all the way to the source of the pain. This means turning inwards and coming to know your wounds.
Once you have verbalised/affirmed your wounds observe how you use them to influence or even control the people around you as well as yourself. As you observe yourself during the day, note your choice of vocabulary, and then formulate new patterns of interaction with others that do not rely upon wound power. Recognise that it is often far more difficult to release the power you derive from your wound than it is to release the memory of the painful experience. A person who cannot let go of wound power is a wound addict, and like all addictions, wound addiction is not easy to break. Don’t be afraid to seek therapeutic help in getting through this step.
Identify the good that can and has come from your wounds. Start living within the consciousness of appreciation and gratitude, and if you have to ~fake it till you make it~. Initiate a spiritual practice and stick to it. Do not be casual about your spiritual discipline.
Once you have established a consciousness of appreciation, you can take on the challenge of forgiveness. As appealing as forgiveness is in theory, it is an extremely unattractive personal action for most people, mainly because the true nature of forgiveness remains misunderstood.
Forgiveness is not the same as telling the person who harmed you "It’s OK". Rather, forgiveness is a complex act of consciousness, one that liberates the soul and psyche from the need for personal revenge and the perception of oneself as a victim. More than releasing from blames the people who caused our wounds, forgiveness means releasing the control that the perception of victimhood has over our psyches. The liberation that forgiveness generates comes in the transition to a higher state of consciousness - not just in theory but energetically and biologically.
Think Love. Live in appreciation and gratitude. Invite change into your life, if only through your attitude. And remind yourself continually of the message of all spiritual masters keep your spirit in the present time. In the language of Jesus "Leave the dead and get on with your life”. And as Buddha taught "there is only Now".